legal advice, aka corporate jerk at work

So here's the long story short, my work has recently required us to sign all of these new employee contracts. Well for one it says these are for new employees which nobody at my store currently is and for two a lot of the stuff on it seems like bullshit. Well my store manager and good friend got put on phase 2 (a step from being fired) for not getting people to sign this. Well his deadline to get this signed by every employee (which no one will without changes) is tomorrow and he is going to be fired, and then potentially every employee that did not sign it. Some of you may think he won't fire every employee at a store, but this guy in charge at corporate is a fat fuck. He's fired entire staffs before and he'll do it again. So here's the document with the company's name edited out to protect myself and my co-workers.

<company> Contract for Employment

As a newly hired employee of <company>, I agree to the following:
1.I will read all the sections of <company>, Inc. Company Policy Manual that pertain to my job position
2.I will follow all policies and procedures as stated in the company manual, internal memos, any changes made to the company manual, and anything communicated by the management team.
3.I understand that I am in a 30-day probation period whereby my employment may be terminated if I do not seem a right fit for <company> or for the position.
4.I understand that I am responsible for securing my own, reliable transportation to work, and will leave for work early enough to combat such issues as traffic, bad weather, flat tire, and all other conditions.
5.I understand I am not to bring any personal items to work including my cell phone, book bag, or anything else.
6.I understand that if I have an issue, I am to go to my direct manager. I am not to state my grievances with a fellow co-worker, a customer, or openly with others.
7.I understand and agree that I cannot simply call in sick at any time during my employment with <company>. I will either need to come into work (and have the manager determine whether or not I am fit to work) or provide a doctor's note for my absence.
8.I understand that, unless approved by District Management, I will be required to work at least 1 weekend shift (either Saturday or Sunday) each and every week.
9.I understand that changing my schedule, including swapping shifts, is not approved unless I provide at least 2-week's notice.
10.I understand that this job at <company> is my primary job and any other job I may have or may obtain in the future is secondary. I will not let any other job I may have interfere with my scheduling or work at <company>.
11.I understand that I will be required to work, without exception, the 3 busiest days of the year. These are the day after Thanksgiving, the Saturday before Christmas, and the day after Christmas.
12.I understand that I cannot request time off for vacation during November or December.
13.I understand that I will be responsible for compensating for any damages caused by my actions or neglect, including overpaying a customer for an item with authorization and theft of product due to my negligence of the rules.
14.I understand that any violations of policy may result in my termination.
15.I will keep a positive attitude at all times to ensure a there is a great environment for me, my co-workers, and our customers.

Oh and he did give us permission to take flat tire off #4 though. HUGE SUCCESS!

So does anyone have any kind of serious legal advice I can take on this if I do get fired do I have any grounds to take this to court or most definitely get unemployment for refusing to sign this?

 

If you in the states, as long as he didn't sexually harass you, or fire you because your race/religion, your beat.

My sister was recently fired because she stopped babysitting her managers kids.
Basically, if cant pull the race card, your better of heading down to unemployment.

Alternatively just sign the dam paper and keep your job.

That or get some chloroform and make your boss go ""Missing""
(joking)[sort-ov]

 

Thing is last time the store manager got fired half the staff got fired too, even ones that did nothing wrong. So I'm worried that if my manager gets fired for no reason I will too then.

 

Do what we all do with those contracts (yes they have them were i work)

sign it, ignore it, it will just shut them up, i doubt that will be strictly in-forced.

 

Well you shouldn't be working for <company> in the first place. It's pretty shitty to begin with.

 

Word to subbie. What shitty store is this so I'll know to never ever go there, and maybe even throw some of my turds at it in the case I've got an extra one lying around.

 

In Australia that seems a bit far fetched.. Also seems as if someone with no experience wrote that up..

[7] Lets go to work vomiting allover the manager.. ^^

 

Well it's just a small chain of video game stores in the midwest you'll probably never notice. I'm just hoping I can stay on till the summer when my friend opens his game store. I've actually already signed this form, but I could potentially be fired as well, since I'm an asst. manager, for not "motivating employees to sign it" like my manager is being fired for.

Also don't take things out on the manager he's a great guy and willing to get fired over it since he has another job and is opening his game store in the summer. He just doesn't want us to be ruled by the gestapo.

 

Oh, you work at a videogame store?

Don't worry about it. If they fire you, light the bathroom on fire.

 

This sounds like every retail job I've ever had. This "contract" doesn't really limit their liability in any way, becasue in a job like that you can essentially be fired at any given time for any reason, "at will" I believe they call it.

Also, this doesn't really limit your legal recourse either, since if for some reason you decided to sue them, you could just claim it was coerced (which it was.)

(BTW, number 7 there is bullshit. If you get sick enough to call out sick, they can't just fire you if you come in with a legit doctor's note. That's like saying I can fire someone if they break their arm or something. He's basically trying to scare people who call out and go the beach or whatever.)

Honestly though, one retail job is pretty much like another one. If they make you sign some dumb bullshit then fire you for being 5 minutes late who the fuck cares? Obviously they didn't want to keep you around in the first place.

 

If you have to leave, make sure to leave the place THE GEORGE COSTANZA WAY...

 

6.I understand that if I have an issue, I am to go to my direct manager. I am not to state my grievances with a fellow co-worker, a customer, or openly with others.

Well, it seems that you may have terminated your own employment anyway lol

Seriously though, I think it's the started bullshit contract drafted up in pseudo legal points. Some of which are vaguely funny tbh. How are you to ensure that you leave for work and get there on time despite perhaps being caught up by unforeseen circumstances such as a flat tire? Are you meant to always leave an hour before you should leave to somehow factor it in?

I also chuckled at the fact that your manager is somehow to determine whether you are well enough to work or not. Apart from being a games store manager, is he also medically trained?

Utter bullshit contract, but the kind of bullshit these numb nuts get away with if they can't manage properly.

I mean, what exactly is "the right fit" for the company?

Enjoy looking for a new job, there are better things out there.

 

Well if they find this and fire me for it oh well fuck them haha.

Apparently the right fit can be anything. Someone got fired for saying the t-shirts we sell for a customer discount are tacky. This was the employee that had sold the most of those tacky t-shirts too!

 

If it were me in that position I wouldn't sigh it just to see what they do. If they fire you then you take an unemployment vacation on their dime until your new job opens up. That or have your manager friend grab your junk on camera then sue for sexual harassment. J/K

 

OH SHIT

WHAT HAPPENS IF YOU GET A FLAT TIRE...


THEN GET ANOTHER FLAT TIRE?




(Yeah, I saw you contested that one properly.)

Normally I would say something like "If you're a good enough employee to not be fired, you shouldn't have a problem because you're a vauable asset."
but as you seem to have put it, that doesn't matter and you might be hosed.

 

Are you an elf working for Santa?

 

#5 is strange "I understand I am not to bring any personal items to work including my cell phone, book bag, or anything else."

So if you work there after school, you have to run home, drop off your backpack and then go to work? What about your lunch, can you bring that? If it's raining you can't bring your umbrella into the store with you or a change of shoes and therefore work in your rain boots? I guess you better not enjoy listening to music on the bus ride either. Also, I suppose you better leave the book you read on your break in the lunch room next door (although from the sounds of this dump, there are no breaks). Ridiculous.

I don't know about the US, but here in Canada #13 is completly illegal
"I understand that I will be responsible for compensating for any damages caused by my actions or neglect, including overpaying a customer for an item with authorization and theft of product due to my negligence of the rules."

In Canada, you are not responsible for any unintended damages caused by you and you most certainly are never responsible if anything is lost due to theft. Here even if you signed a contract like this, you still wouldn't be liable since you cannot legally sign away your rights. Tell these idiots that this is what insurance is for. I hope the place burns down.

Seriously though, for a management position at a videogame store, this isn't worth the trouble. It's a dead end and you could make more money across the street.

 

I say you go out with a bang. Start organizing a union!

 

Most of those are bog standard for retail. Those sound pretty similar to where I work.

Some of those points, though, are simply BS. Stuff happens, if you can't call your manager ("hey, I had a flat tire, I may be a bit late") and have it not be a big deal, then you need to find another job.


example: recently posted in my break room was a huge sign saying "NO REQUESTS OFF FROM MARCH 12 to 21". Of course, this is spring break. The idea is not to prevent people from taking a couple days off, it's to prevent every single from taking the whole week off. Kind of a blanket CYA statement.

 

Kill the fat fuck...it's only wrong if you're caught