Regardless of your nationality you have to laugh at these :smt023 TOMMY COOPER - COMIC GENIUS Two blondes walk into a building.......... you'd think at least one of them would have seen it. Phone answering machine message - "... If you want to buy marijuana, press the hash key..." I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day but I couldn't find any. I went to the butchers the other day and I bet him 50 quid that he couldn't reach the meat off the top shelf. He said, "No, the steaks are too high." My friend drowned in a bowl of muesli. A strong currant pulled him in. A man came round in hospital after a serious accident. He shouted, "Doctor, doctor, I can't feel my legs!" The doctor replied, "I know you can't, I've cut your arms off". I went to a seafood disco last week...and pulled a muscle. Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly. They lit a fire in the craft, it sank, proving once and for all that you can't have your kayak and heat it. Our ice cream man was found lying on the floor of his van covered with hundreds and thousands. Police say that he topped himself. Man goes to the doctor, with a strawberry growing out of his head. Doc says "I'll give you some cream to put on it." 'Doc I can't stop singing The Green, Green Grass of Home. That sounds like Tom Jones syndrome. ' Is it common? ' "It's not unusual." A man takes his Rotteweiller to the vet. "My dog's cross-eyed, is there anything you can do for him?" "Well," says the vet, "let's have a look at him" So he picks the dog up and examines his eyes, then checks his teeth. Finally, he says, "I'm going to have to put him down." "What? Because he's cross-eyed? ""No, because he's really heavy" Guy goes into the doctor's. "Doc, I've got a cricket ball stuck up my backside." "How's that?" "Don't you start!" Two elephants walk off a cliff...boom, boom! What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh. So I was getting into my car, and this bloke says to me "Can you give me a lift?" I said "Sure, you look great, the world's your oyster, go for it.' Apparently, 1 in 5 people in the world are Chinese. There are 5 people in my family, so it must be one of them. It's either my mum or my Dad, or my older Brother Colin, or my younger Brother Ho-Cha-Chu? But I think it's Colin. Two fat blokes in a pub, one says to the other "Your round." The other one says "So are you, you fat bast**d!" Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, and the other was eating fireworks. They charged one and let the other one off. "You know, somebody actually complimented me on my driving today. They left a little note on the windscreen. It said,'Parking Fine.' So that was nice." A man walked into the doctors, he said, "I've hurt my arm in several places" The doctor said, "Well don't go there anymore" The worlds worst air disaster occurred early this morning when a small two-seater Cessna plane crashed into a cemetery. LFB USAR workers have recovered 1826 bodies so far and expect that number to climb as digging continues into the night
You may have to explain what hundreds and thousands are to the Americans here. Well... not to me, my sister in-law is Austrailian. :smt023
what does it with hundreds and thousands ? because i do not think it is thousand dollar bills we are talking about.
Warning, SEVERE GEEK HUMOUR Ahead! Two strings walk into a bar: String1: Barkeep, I'll have a Gin and Tonic String2: I'll Have one toohce8dn48ndf9dfn874jfm48h83ecn8hg4f784rfhb84rhf4r8gfo3djh9dj4mu8f Barkeep: What's wrong with your friend? String1: You'll have to excuse him, hes not NULL terminated. XD.
thanks :smt043 :smt043 :smt043 now i get it i do not eat donuts but i do eat softice so i know now what it is (it is topping right ?)
:smt043 :smt043 the word for thousands in danish is krymmel so that is why i thought it was funny (or is it "topping" ?) you made that emoteicon to ? well it is on top so it must be topping and i know toppings is normally something you put on a pizza like extra cheese and other things WolverineDK
