My girlfriend just left me...

...I'm in shock, not sure what to do with my life now, she was my everything.

I'm tempted to pick up a job offer I had in South Korea but I'm not sure if running away from it all is the best idea...

...any recommendations.

 

Take the job. Theres a whole world outside that waits to be discovered. My two cents on that.

Keep going man, it will pass.

 

thanks.

 

You're welcome. Remember, its not running away, its just going to forget!

 

yes, i have a couple friends that went there, and were wishing to return with a korean girl

think positive, and good will come!

 

Do it! A fresh start would do you the world of good, I am sure, and you'll be away from reminders etc.

 

Dude, that truly sucks.

Just remember, however, that life could be a hell of a lot worse and that you're never too old to drop everything and go to a foreign country - even if it's just to get a break.

Take care, my British compatriot, and if you're ever down Plymouth way you may be permitted to give me a shout.

 

Korea might be a bit far at first. I'd suggest travelling around Europe. Make the most of the EU, work in some different and unique places, meet lots of new people and take a year or 2 off to clear your mind, bad memories and discover what you want to do with yourself.

 

Wow. Really? How did they manage it? Do they know korean?

 

Cheers for the support guys, feeling truly truly awful. I knew things were difficult between us but not this bad.

 

Seriously mate, i am sorry to hear this.

However it sounds as thuogh you are already thinking on the right lines..... Get out, explore and enjoy!

 

I`m really sorry to hear about this mate, We don`t know the circumstances as it is a personal thing between the two of you, so can`t really offer much advice apart from DO NOT make any rash decisions, this job offer may be exactly what you are looking for but you must wait a while for this to settle in and you are thinking clearly.

Is the break up final, was it messy with no going back? These are questions only you know the answer to, it would be awful if you both felt you could work it out and you were on the other side of the world. But of course waiting around for her is not a great idea really. I hope you can find something to take your mind off this long enough for you to decide whats best for you. Once again sorry to hear the news.

 

Well I suffered a bout of depression in November/December and it just made me very aggrivating and argumentative and I knew things weren't going to well but we both agreed to persevere and I promised to make things better. Recently Ive been much happier, we've had the odd little argument but generally I've being alot to keep her happy.

This week she was a bit off and I could feel that something was up and she told me that she was finding the relationship hard work and that we weren't having much fun.

I promised her that things would get better real soon when I got a job sorted but apparently she can't keep up with it all anymore on top of her uni work and part time job.

Its mainly my fault but I don't feel she's given me much of a chance to pick myself back up.

Anyway she text me today saying we needed to talk and I knew immediately what that meant, I just did a 2 hour round trip to Bournemouth to see her and she just wouldn't reconsider and said that she didn't want to do it anymore.

She was really upset but just couldn't see a way back to how it used to be. It's come as a shock to me as I didn't think things were that bad.

We'd only been together 11 months but we got on so well, had so many common interests and it was a connection we both thought could never be broken.

 

you're not running away you're moving on.

 

I believe everything happens for a reason. Maybe you guys breaking up is a sign that you need to take the job because you couldn't take it before with her being at uni and all. Who knows... Stay strong and really think about your decisions. I trust it will all work out in the end.

 

It seems like you both have a lot of stress in your lives right now, studying/job hunting etc can put a real strain on a relationship as you will both inevitably be constantly tired and find it far easier to get into arguments. Living an hour away can`t make life easy, especially if she has a busy schedule. It`s far too early to say move on really as you have been in this relationship for a while now. Do you feel she is justified in calling time on the relationship and has she given you reason in the past to think she could just say something like this and then try and take it back.

Like others have said, you may feel quite quickly that as you arent tied down you can make the choices in your life that would have been hard to make with a partner at home in England.

 

When a relationship breaks down, especially when it comes as a shock then it hurts like hell and will continue to do so until you're in a position to be honest with yourself and admit that things probably wouldn't have worked out!

The good thing about relationships though is none of them are worthless. Whatever happened in your time together is something that will only provide greater insight into what constitutes a great relationship somewhere further down the line.

If I were you, I'd look into this Korean job and keep remaining positive. Nobody in your life is your 'everything', that position is exclusively occupied by your future children. Just remember what you had and move on. As hard as that may seem, as brutal that comes across nobody has the right to remove your sense of self-worth or pride to the extent that you feel 'you cannot go on'.

I know nothing about Korea, but I bet a trip out for several months or a couple of years would truly broaden your horizons.

 

I'm finding it hard because if I'm honest with myself....it would work out.

Something just doesn't add up. It's easy to jump to the obvious conclusion however I'm 100% sure that its not that.

In terms of progress she's agreed to let me come around on tuesday evening after an Interview I have for a job and help her with some Dreamweaver stuff she has for a critique the next day. I've promised her that I won't try to talk her round or come to a second and final decision but just that she thinks about things over the next few days.

I've said that when I'm there I won't touch her or try anything or bring up the topic but just act normal and friendly like days of old.

It may seem like a bad idea but I think if I'm there pulling out all of the stops and I can actually see the problem then maybe I'll feel a little better about things.

Let's just hope her mates don't poison her out of it in the meantime.

 

there's plenty of women, and plus, you ve got two working hands mate! best of luck in Korea, it should be an experience away from home =)

 

two surely is better than one! :lol: