A very very sad day

I actually do know someone that lost a lot of games in a divorce. Rule 1: Don't marry a gamer.

 

Lets hope she doesnt change her mind...

And ryan, whats up with the HP theme?

 

you missed the entire 4 page harry potter thread from a week ago? 0_o

 

yea, i think RGGG looks hot in his avatar, not sure if he's of legal age to talk to me on msn though.

just kidding

 

Well this evening I have talked my wife into seeing a marriage counsellor

So keeping my fingers crossed. :nod:

But I have already made an appointment to see a Solicitor next week just in case nothing comes of this evening :-(


Wish me luck guys :thumbsup:

 

Good luck man but Assembler is right. At the first sign of something like this take all your crap and make it vanish.

 

Best of luck. Be vigilant however and ready for the worst, and in the end try to see the bright side of either result.

 

Break a leg;-)

 

Looking at the worst outcome and anything else seems an improvement...in a bizarre way

 

I am sure that you are doing your utmost to ensure your marriage continues. Considering the pressure people come under to just give up, I think you are very brave to tackle this head-on via mediation. Good luck and remain positive throughout, if not for yourself, do so for your children!

 

Well the latest on this is.....as nothing here for a while

She had said she arranged to go to Cardiff for a freinds party

But lot`s of things didn`t seem to fit

Anyone after a lot of stuff I am not going to put here.........came across "proof" that there is someone else

I may present here with this and see what happens, but at the end of the day I don`t think it will make any difference to the situation

Over the next few days I am going to address some points/questions with my Solicitor as to what the next stage of proceedings may be.

 

Up until the last post I was thinking...


Chin you lad, its going to be a rocky road ahead but you come across as a sound guy. Well done for trying all means of working it out. In the long run things will work themselves out and in the long you you will be happier.

After your last post its ..

Screw her, your better off without her. You will find someone much better. Your a good lad and I can tell you care. You will bounce back from this.


(Sorry if it in anyway offends anyone)

 

Think its the best you can do out of it man. Go on, even if it hurts. Sign another entry on the world's debt list.

 

I agree with you

 

It must be stressful, I realize. Keep an objective and cold view as possible, since emotion doesn't help when it isn't a good emotion.

 

Thats really hard to hear, I can't imagine finding what proof you found and imagining that your wife is cheating on you. Might not be my place to say, but what do you plan to do with the kids?

 

What does your wife have? Debts? No future? No prospects? Any conceivable reason to get up in the morning? I would hope you get the kids. That way, she can deal with her own problems (finacial or whatnot) and leave you and the kids out of it. Theres no reason why you should have to keep paying and paying for problems she made for herself, and not the other way around.

She's leaving you. She made the choice about not being able to work things out, not you. And when kids are involved, thats selfish. If she wants to leave, thats fine, but get someone to represent you so you don't get screwed because it looks like thats what she might intend to do.

 

Don't show your hand until you have loaded the decks! Ensure that your solicitor is 100% in on the whole situation, that you have presented the evidence to the legal profession prior to her. Then, once you have an opportunity sit her down and present your side.

The reason I say this is that if you present your side of the situation too early then she can put the wheels in motion whilst you are at work and unable to take time out or whatever. Inform your employer now (if you haven't already). Explain that you are determined to ensure that you come into work, but right now you would like the opportunity to establish whether your employer offers councilling services (and hey, you never know, legal advice!)

Your employer may or may not give a shit, but it's what the courts see and the steps you took that will matter.

It sounds terrible to say this but any time after 5pm on a Friday evening is about the most ideal opportunity for you to start the discussions with your wife, having spoken to your solicitor ahead of the conversation. That gives you an entire weekend, but it also means that any legal retaliation cannot occur until Monday at the earliest, where upon you could have already asked your solicitor to draft the necessary papers (such as divorce proceedings on the grounds of adultery) ahead of her. The person who files has the strongest case!

I wish you all the best in this. The most important aspect in all of this is ensuring that your protect the children, your ability to remain in contact with them, your legal rights as the children's natural father, then your own situation. The monetary aspects are important, but you'd be surprised at how swiftly that can be resolved. You'll have to be as sharp as a tac throughout this and as direct as a laser.

Be wary of every kind emotion. I have lost count of the times I have heard (or even had) polite, amicable conversations with my ex-wife only to discover a couple of days later that she had smashed a hammer-type legal blow at the same time as smiling away to me. Don't get sucked into that, you'd be amazed what the survival instinct can bring out in people!

Expect the unexpected, assume the worst and deal with things calmly, do not get dragged into shit, if you falter on something then deal with it immediately. Don't let it fester hoping that it will go away.

Also, TODAY start looking for Marriage Guidance council locally (even if you have attempted it and it failed, or she fails to show up). What you are showing is YOUR commitment to the marriage, the relationship and the family unit. In court that will be noted, so if she claims you are NOT a responsible or present father figure, then you have evidence to the contrary.

Seriously, best of luck! Don't lose the kids - the consoles, the collection and the cash are nothing when you lose contact with your child(ren).

 

i know exactly what you're talking about...had the same situation, well we weren't married, but the rest is the same...

 

I know this sounds bad (becos I'm sure it was a bad moment) but the fact that she was cheating on you should help to reinforce your case in a divorce.

I agree with the others: be ice cold with her, or else she will take advantage of it.

Good luck dude, and never look back.